Sep 15, 2022
In General Discussions
When I started seeing my husband (the first guy I wasn't embarrassed to tell my therapist about), I was gobsmacked to realize how much I hadn't known about dating. In fact, I'd been going about being single all wrong. I didn't have very much fun at it, which is depressing since I didn't pair up until my 30's. Besides, so much luck was involved in my finding my match that there are probably more alternate universes where I'm still living solo than where I'm married. I realize that my past experiences have made me who I am today, but I still wish I could go back in time and give some dating tips to poor, clueless, "younger me" about relationships. 1. Set your priorities straight. Finding a romantic partner is only one of many goals you can have at once. There's a difference between making something a priority and having an obsession. No one wants to be the Captain Ahab of the dating world. One of the best pieces of dating advice I have gotten is that relationships are great, but don't obsess over them! 2. Know exactly what you want in a person — and don't compromise. For example, when you like a guy and your mutual friends have multiple anecdotes about him projectile vomiting after excessive drinking, you may need to rethink the infatuation. You didn't like it when your godson hurled on you, and he's a toddler. 3. Know what real love is about. It's not about getting someone to think you're good enough for them. It’s about finding someone you can stand to spend a ridiculous amount of time with. It's about finding the puzzle piece you fit with and the Ernie to your Bert.